Saturday, March 14, 2015

Hope Triumphs Where All Else Fails!

Yep.  I did it.  Nobody really believed I could, but I did.  Yay me!  ^_^

I mean, I read these blogs, guys.  Picasso and Navi, you know I read this blog and so I know you think I'm crazy!  I know you were just humoring me because it was your job or whatever.  But you didn't ever really think that there was any way to improve anything.  That's why you never tried to.  And that's why you secretly laughed at me for believing that with optimism and perseverance even a terrible life can be made better!

But this is why I always remind you all to smile :)

If things are bad now that just means that the only way to go is up.

Sometimes, it takes a little bit of work before it happens, but if that's all I'm here on this earth to accomplish then I will do it happily.  Helping others is all I care about.

I met Slicer (yes Slicer, not Slypher.  He's been bugging me about it and of course I would never want to do anything that makes him unhappy!) a couple of months ago now.  Time is hard to keep track of!  Not that it really matters, it's not like I'm rushing off to do anything important.  Just towards death like everybody else :D

When I met my friend Slicer, I could tell that he was in a really bad place in his life.  Sure, he was torturing me, but I could tell that it was really hurting him in a less physical way.  The old, this is going to hurt me a lot more than it hurts you.  Because Slicer is a really really kind and funny person.  He's sweet and all he's ever wanted to do in his life was help people.  I couldn't let a person like that suffer!

See, I used to be a prison psychiatrist.  And sometimes when I would look into the eyes of people that had been condemned as horrible by the rest of the world, I'd see trapped, crying children.  I helped to free them.  I led them out and helped them smile.  I knew I could save Slicer too, and I have.

With everyone's help of course!

I knew that all he needed was to hang out with more of his proxy friends.  See, his buddy Tracker came to hang out with us!  He's here now, he's on the phone actually, and he's super duper nice!  He and Slicer get along so well, just like him and Picasso except less insults!

Remember when I said that Slicer used to be a doctor?  And that if we could just convince his friends to let him stop torturing people and start doctoring again it'd make him so much happier?  Well Picasso said that if the cell he's from were big enough they would be able to keep Slicer on staff as a full time DOCTOR!!!!  Isn't that just the most amazingly wonderfulest thing ever?

So Piccolo and Navi and I and some other peoples Picasso knows are going to be hanging out with Tracker and Slicer's cell family for a while!  I can't wait to meet them!  Slicer has told me a bit about them and they just sound AMAZING!  

Picasso and Tracker are on the phones with their respective bosses right now working out the details, but I can't imagine why either would complain.  It would make Slicer so so happy!  And a new adventure for the rest of us!

Not that I'm going to be a proxy, of course.  I will hang out with them and help them out but I will never do what that monster tells me to ever! ^_^

And so (as if more even needs to be added on) a list of things to be happy about today!

  • I get to meet a whole bunch more people who I can make happier!
  • My wonderful friend Carter is coming to America!  We're in Atlanta if you ever want to hang out!  (I'll keep an ear out for anyone named Sam!)
  • I have a SECOND rainbow dress!
  • Waffles!  Oh, and pancakes!  Breakfast foods are delicious!
  • Tracker and Slicer are reunited at last!  Friendship is Amazing!
  • There is an unending number of people in this world to make friends with!

And you are the most beautiful person I have yet to meet.



  1. It's not that simple April dear. Theres a lot of talks to figure out. Logistics to decided on. Forms and insurances to figure out. Pecking order. Penis measuring contests. Not to mention the three-legged hacky-sack race (that can turn into a real blood bath believe me).

    Its gonna take some time sweet. Especially trying to get you classified as a proxy when you keep insisting your not. Do me a favor dear, and lie for me? Bureaucrats eat that shit up.

    We really should have come up with a term for a fake proxy by now. Especially after the incident with Ember's old order. Proxy's proxy is just a mouthful. No body calls proxies agents anymore do they? Can I steal that shit?

    From now on, proxy proxies are agents. So say I, the lord Guardian Fracture. I am totally not mad with imaginary power.

    1. God damn it. Between 'proxies', 'hallows', 'hollows', 'masks', 'bureaucrats', 'fallen', the 'red lit', 'fire cultists', the 'mask-less', and now 'agents', that's 10 different fucking ways to describe proxy-kind in distinctly different ways and degrees.

      That's like when you find out Eskimos have 10 different words to describe snow and you're like 'Herp derp, that's so many. They're weird'. That's us now. This is what you've done to us.

      Let me guess, next you'll be announcing that Cordelia's men are Cabalist for her to go with the title YOU assigned them as a Cabal. That'll make 11 different words for proxy, 6 of which come from you in some shape, form, or capacity. Over half! Kindly calm your tits.

    2. As servants to a monster we, us as proxies, hail as being the embodiment of the fear of strangers I feel like it is our right and duty to classify and identify ourselves more thoroughly so we may fear and alienate ourselves from each other as strangers out of raising concerns about how varied and different we are from each other.

      For Father!

      In short: Fuck you.

    3. Oh god damn it. Do you guys have to do this on MY blog?! Fuck off the both of you.

    4. Wowie zowie comments! Don't be mean, Piccolo, it's just exciting to know that someone cares enough to talk with each other! We shouldn't try to keep them from it.

    5. But all they do is piss each other off!

  2. All this happiness is giving me a REALLY bad rash. Knock it off. Be miserable like the rest of us. Go get a loved one hit by a car or something. Jesus.

    1. Hello! I'm excited to see someone new! Nice to meet you, Morningstar, how are you this fine day? Don't worry, I'm not going to stop smiling, and neither should you.

      Stay cheerful!


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