Saturday, February 23, 2013

Exaggerated Reports of my Death

They are exaggerated.

Seriously, I'M NOT DEAD. So I lost a little bit of my Kool-Aid, so WHAT? The body makes more!

Like lots more! Just takes time. I feels LOADS better. I felt bad when I was low on Kool-Aid, and now that some time has passed and my body has made some more I feel fine. And my body will keep making more. Eventually I'll be ABLE TO DO STUFF, again.

Right now I can only do one handed things so I'm assuming I only have 50% of my Kool-Aid yet because its still not safe to use my other arm or make WIDER MOTIONS with that half of my body. Err... that corner really?

So I have like 75% if its just that one forth I can't use right?

See? Nothing to worry about. I'm getting BETTER all the time!


Moth seems to think I should talk about what happened. He left me a note telling me to before he left today.

I told him, "THAT'S FUCKING STUPID. Who would hear it? You? Why would I pander to some SOULLESS FUCKING MUTE. I'll just blog it."

He started growling. Felt on his forehead. LEFT LIKE A BITCH. I win. I always do.


Okay, so Moth was searching this hotel floor. It was another dead end, apparently, but he wanted clues or something? Somewhere to go from here that might have answers. Which is silly. We're following a 6 year old trail. TIME DESTROYS CLUES.

Now, in hindsight, I should have known we were about to get attacked. I've been getting sloppy. COMPLIANT.

Some police bitch came up and was asking people to leave one at a time. I didn't SEE her, but I heard her. First missed Red Flag, she skipped us.

Second flag came when I realized she missed only us. I thought to my self, "OH?! Alone? NAP TIME!"

So I stretched. I was getting ready to curl up on the floor. Let Moth do his stupid searching thing ON HIS FUCKING OWN.

I remember hearing a 'ping' sound from the glass behind me. Sudden, my should was ON FIRE! And GUSHING Kool-Aid.

I should have dropped then but I wasn't thinking.

I grabbed my shoulder and tried to keep the Kool-Aid in by bracing the back wound against the wall and pushing on the front which hurt like ALL FUCKING HELL. IT BURNED, AND STUNG, and the red was getting everywhere.

"M-Moth!" I called. He was already coming over, he heard it too. He took one look at me and the window behind me and dropped.


I didn't get to finish that. There was a noise...

'Click'. Like the sound of a trigger being pulled?

I finally dropped myself. I finally realized what was going on.

It wasn't hot anymore... things where starting to get cold. I was having a hard time moving....


I threw all my weight with what little strength I could muster into one direction and watched as a bullet ripped through the glass again and cut right into the floor.

I don't know why it took me so long to realized I had been shot from behind... should have been faster... or something...

Moth scooped me up. Ran. One arm under me, one arm trying to keep pressure on my shoulder.

So much... Kool-Aid. I was too big... or he was too small. We weren't moving fast enough.



I kicked the wall hard. Threw us Moth off balance and we started to fall.


Never heard the world scream so loud when I ripped a path portal open.

THE MONSTERS CAN HEAR IT. They were coming.

Moth quickly scooped me up once more. In his panic he started running. Random direction. I could hear them. Chasing us.

It was so dark. No more colors... or shapes... just blurs...

Moth stopped... must not be just behind us anymore.

More SCREAMS as I forced one last portal open... fell into the black...

Woke up in bed, stitched up... and cold.

Could barely move. I was so weak. I looked up at Moth hovering over me. He had passed out... hunch over me.

I did what anyone would have done. I LURCHED MY SELF high and headbutted him HARD in his STUPID FUCKING FACE and then screamed BLOODY FUCKING MURDER as my stitches ripped open.

And I've been recovering ever since.

See? No reason to be dead. Didn't lose all my Kool-Aid. Hell, that sniper only hit me ONCE! I'm tougher then that. It'd take 5 bullets minimum and AT LEAST 2 of those bullets would need to have been head shots.

I'm fine.

Picasso Entry End.


  1. Oh I'm so glad you're alright. I was really worried.

    1. I believe I PROMISED I'd stay alive.

      Relax. Keep up your end of that promise. OR ELSE.

      Also, how is Dog?

    2. Jill's doing well. She's a smart girl, and she's taken to being trained extremely well.

    3. Hahaha. It has a people name. Its not people.

  2. Are you sure you aren't dead? Stranger things have happened.

    1. I'm pretty sure I'm not dead. If I was dead I couldn't do THIS. Or THIS. And I especially couldn't do ALL OF THIS.

      Case closed.

  3. Figured you weren't dead. I'd be personally pissed if all it took to kill you was a sniper. There's nothing awesome or memorable about that.


    1. Nothing honorable or memorable about getting stabbed in the chest by your best friend either. SHIT HAPPENS. And you make them pay for it.

  4. I knew you weren't dead. I have a feeling you're going to die in a literal blaze of glory.

    Snipers aren't that.


    1. I'll avoid the glory fountain. And glory doors, ditches, or holes.

      Anything that might shoot up a blaze to end me. I WILL NOT BE BLAZED!

  5. Very funny Moth. Just keep the gag going, throw us off that trail looking for the dead.

    Its pathetic really. Just let her go. The truth will set you free. We aren't buying it so this isn't helping you.

    1. OH GOD FUCKING DAMN IT! Is this reverse psychology? Are you TRYING to trick me into storming out into the open so the sniper can finish me when I reveal myself?

      TOO FUCKING BAD. No ones that stupid.


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