Sunday, February 17, 2013

No Loose Lips

But sometimes shit just sinks, I guess.

They found us.

I'm assuming they found us with Trackers. Couldn't have been the blog this time, we were being careful for once. But we haven't been moving very far in our search and I guess they just eventually caught up to us. I suppose it doesn't help that Picasso keeps making a public spectacle of herself and has easily identifiable pieces of mask glued to her stupid fucking face.

It pains me to say so but we should have been using the path to create breaks in our trail or to just rush our travel time in general. But... I just... really do not want to go there. That place makes me want to peel away at my own flesh to stop my skin from crawling. It really just... fucks with my head in general. I can't concentrate when I go there. I keep forgetting where I was going when I'm in there...

But I see little alternative anymore. Not that it will help nearly as much right now since we've been searching out a finite area. If we have another incident, we'll have to abandon on search and resume regular running.


Hmm... I neglected to mention what happened. Picasso was shot in the shoulder. Sniper round.  I'm assuming. It came in through a window on the 8th floor.

Shes alive... but she shouldn't be. I had to hide her somewhere so she could recover in peace while I keep searching. Apparently she has been writing whenever she can to keep herself busy. Still rambling on about her time with Nee-Chan.

No fear of death. She doesn't even seem to grasp that she should be dead. She just keeps writing about her friend, like nothing happened...

Unfortunately I don't have time to write up an explanation of what exactly happened when she got shot but I'll get to that soon. For now I'll just fill the rest of this post with Picasso's ramblings.

I've edited this a little.



So we went to bed... YES. I remember that was what I was talking about. I curled up in the bed with Sis... Nee-Chan.  She was acting ALL KINDS of cute and shy. So nervous. I knew the moment she fell asleep because her heart FINALLY stopped racing. I was making her SO uncomfortable. It was a lot of fun. Never felt so... tolerated... she didn't YELL or GLARE or TAKE MY SHIT when I was doing something violent or goofy. She pretended to enjoy it. It was nice.

I... remember dreaming about... PUDDING. DELICIOUS PUDDING. It was very where in every flavor. And just when I thought I had seen and tasted all the different puddings... MORE PUDDING!

But then an ANOMALY appeared.  THE SWIRLY VORTEX! It was taking ALL the pudding. Then it took me too. I got pulling in head first. I hit the ground head first too. I opened my eyes to find pudding paradise was gone. ALL GONE.

I crawled black onto the bed. The blanket was no substitute for pudding... but it would HAVE TO do.

I closed my eyes and tried to relocate pudding land. I was locked back into this world by something better.

"He he. Good morning Twitch Girl," teased Nee-Chan.

"Good morning Nee-Sweetie," I grumbled out rubbing my eyes. She tried to hide a blush. ALWAYS so flustered.

"So... what are we gonna do today? I only have one day and I want to do lots of stuff!" she explained with a SURPRISING amount of energy for how early it was.

"Ummm...." I thought finally sitting up. "I don't know. What do you like? Tell me, TELL ME NOW!"

"Ummm... I don't know... Animes... like knives too..." she giggled. "And of course Slendy boy."

... HATE Daddy... EVERYTHING is his fault! My BROTHER and FRACTURE and the constant FUCKING NOISE, all of it is all his fault. Gods can do anything... He could have stopped ALL OF IT. He could fix it now. BUT HE DOESN'T. He lets it happen because he doesn't love me... HE LETS THE BAD THINGS IN.

"What do you like!?" she asked violently SNAPPING me back to earth.

I decided I should probably keep my grudges to myself... FOR NOW! Or... then. I've obvious stopped 'now'. But not 'then'. BACK TO THE FLASH BACK.

I had to speak fast with something cool, intelligent, and preferably accurate or my rage would leak out. 

"PAINTING!" I screamed, straight into her ear as a response.

Nailed it....

She didn't mind me screaming in her ear though. As always, she was SO TOLERANT. She didn't even complain. She smiled and giggled, pretended to be interested.

I wish I could have kept her and sent Moth back with Theta instead...



// Note to self,
//SUCK LESS! Upon reflection, that last segment contained FAARRR to many self-loathing notes and
//COPIOUS signs of weakness. FIX IT!
//Secondary note,
//Modify my admission of SEETHING HATRED for Daddy or OUTRIGHT remove it. Self analysis has
//revealed the admission will likely damage the disposition of potential proxy allies who may be sympathetic 
//to our plight.
//Third note,
//Moth is being a COMPLETE FUCKING ASS. He is insisting on greater radio silence so this segment
//needs to be attached to the former one. REMEMBER to write a little something to connect the segments.

[Moth note: I couldn't be bothered to do any of that so I let this in here too and made it visible]

"Anime huh..." I thought to myself moving over to Moth's laptop. I know he keeps Japanese cartoon on its.

"Mmmmhmmm!" she responded as excited as ever!

"LIKE THIS?!" I declared turning the laptop to her.

She got SUPER flustered. She kept trying to say things but nothing came out and she turned AN ALL NEW color of red I hadn't see her use before. I think she might have stopped breathing or something.

"Yes...? No...? BREATH!!!" I yelled at her shaking her a bit to trying to snap her out of it.

"I-I DON'T KNOW!" she finally spit out. Never heard her yell like that before.

"You're SO ADORABLE in that shade of red!" I teased her.


I could stop LAUGHING. It took me a minute to regain my FLAWLESS composure.

"Why don't you show me some of YOUR anime!" I smiled, trying to reassure her that everything was alright. You know, because IT WAS.

"I uh... W-Well... Okay..." she stammered out just BARELY starting to calm down.

She took the laptop and loaded up a website labeled 'Hulu'. Apparently they have a bunch of undubbed animes on there that haven't even made over to the states on official release. LAZY FUCKING JAPANESE.

We both sat down to watch. Lots of colors and sounds and things CONSTANTLY happening, at first at least.

Apparently the show was ''Madoka" or something along those lines?

"I think I remember some of these girl from MY anime website!" I declared excitedly.

"Shush! Just watch. It gets good soon!" said Nee-Chan rocking impatiently and energetically in her seat.

Kind of mean... BUT SHE WAS RIGHT! It got good. And then sad...

There was one that looked kind of like Nee-Chan, COMPLETE with BEAUTIFUL pink hair.

There was also this HORRIBLE BITCH with long red hair who acted all mean and tough and shit but was ALL SAD on the inside. I HATED HER. Don't be sad! FUCK EVERYONE ELSE. They can go die. You just be all that awesome and let the sadness GO FUCK ITSELF... nonexistent... anime person. TAKE THAT!

[Moth Note: It might interest you all to know that Picasso has long red hair that she is very proud of.]

I heaved a heavy sigh at the end resting against Nee-Chan for the supports. Animes are draining...

"SO... LONG..." I playfully whined.

"Yeah... but so good," she sniffled. I looking up to see her wiping away tears.

"I think my anime was better. It got a WAY happier response."

"W-Well y-yeah but-"

"You got ALL red and excited!" I teased interrupting her.

"Sh-Shut up! Idiot!"

//Fourth note: Write a connecting bridge from this segment to the next one. DON'T FORGET!



//Note: Write all of this when I'm feeling better and it doesn't take me 20 minutes to write out a sentence.

[Moth: She wrote the following shortly after some bed rest following her injury. She insisted on doing something. I edited a lot of this part. It was mostly grammatical and spelling errors. Everything was also originally in all capital letters for some reason.]

So the anime was over. It was good, despite the stupid fucking redhead's worthlessness.

I suggested we do knives next which sort of confused Sister Girl.

"Uh... What about them, exactly?"

"Doing them... you know. We did animes so now we should do knives."

And with that I pulled out my suitcase of knives.

//Note: Just realized, never did state Moth left during the anime. Write it into last segment when better.
//Won't make sense otherwise.

"Doing what?" she asked thoroughly confused.

"... Picking... your present! Yes. That."

That confused her more... for some reason. Ridiculous goof.

"Y-You sure?"

"Of course. Each one is a memory of a kill... or someone I've yet to kill. I want you to have one."

"I... there are so many. Which should I pick?"


She got even more unsure and confused. Goof.

I finally chose one for her.

Two butterfly knives... complete with butterfly patterns and engravings. When you hold the two together, the art forms one big butterfly. Beautiful... perfect gift.

"Beautiful... they're perfect," she said taking them with a hug. She moved back. Played with them. Put'em away. "Thank you!"

"Welcome. Got them from a proxy. Serious butterfly theme. Think I threw her off a roof," I giggled.

//Note: Remove or Modify
So much happier then. Hurts now.

 "I love them" she beamed.

So happy...



//Note to self:
//Be more careful. Ripping open stitches HURTS LIKE A BITCH and Moth is being EXTRA mean right

[Moth: This part wasn't written in all capitals and has a lot more of Picasso's 'flair'.]

Typing with one arm FUCKING SUCKS ASS.


So I gave s... Nee-Chan her butterflied butterfly knives. She was SO happy and ADORABLE.

"Lets do one of your things next," she giggled. "You mentioned painting."

"LOVE painting," I giggled back.

"You should paint something then!"

"Sounds FUN. But what should I paint?"

"Oh, oh! Draw Slendy boy!"

I worked hard to hide a cringe. I really did not want to glorify that ASSHOLE. But... I didn't want to start a fight over it.

"Sure..." I said as enthusiastically as possible.

So I pulled out my brush and some blood packs and got to work.

Whispered threats to my brush the whole time. "You BETTER fucking paint what I tell you to paint FOR ONCE you stupid sack of SHIT"

And sure enough... it didn't paint Daddy. The damn thing is just LUCKY it keeps painting more acceptable things.

"QUIT RUINING MY PAINTINGS!" I yelled at it about ready to smash the shit out of it against the wall.

"I-It looks fine to me, Twitch," said Nee-Chan in partial awe.

I looked up at it again. "IT'S NOT-" I started before I got my first real look at it.

It was Nee-Chan being hugged by a bunch of faceless figures of various forms and sizes.


"What is it?"

"Looks like you... and a bunch of faceless FREAKS."

She blushed again and turned to hide a smile before looking back up at it. "I-I like it. No ones ever drawn me before..."

"Should have drawn in ANIME style," I growled down at my brush.

"Stop it! I love it. I wish I could take it home..." she said, both of us now regretting the fact that I painted it right onto the wall.

"I can draw this on paper for you!" I said pulling out my AWESOME sketch book.

"Oh no! Y-You don't have to do-"

"I INSIST!" I declared and got to work. I looked up a moment to see her shy smile. I could see she was worried about all the stuff I kept giving her. WASN'T GONNA STOP ME!

I heard Moth come back in while I was HARD AT WORK sketching. Looked like he brought in a bunch of supplies for travel. I tried to stay focused on the drawing.

Nee-Chan said something I didn't entirely catch and then went silent so I looked up and...


[Moth: I removed these paragraphs. They contain details about what we're up to. I used paper to communicate and we discussed our next move.]


...I looked back down at the sketch pad and just got back to work. Just... NEED TO FOCUS... Ignore it...

Took forever but I was FINALLY done.


"It looks beautiful," she said as she looked it over. "I love the changes," she giggled blushing.

I added Daddy, Moth, and myself into the picture as 3 of the 10 figures hugging her.

"Good," I giggled and was suddenly pulled into a SURPRISE ATTACK... better known as a hug.

I could hear her stomach rumble.

"Oi..." she whined.

"I should fetch some food!" I declared getting up.

"No, no, no, no, no. I'll get it... You've done enough for me today."

"OH NO YOU DON'T! You're my guest. I'll get the food."

"I... I guess," she said forcing a smile. I could see I might be over doing it... or it could be that other thing...

Not that I remember that at that exact moment.

"Hows Arby's sound?"

"S-Sounds good," she said still sounding unsure about letting me handle this.

I gave her a reassuring smile and left to get us some food.



// Delete most of this. Rewrite it. Lie. I don't want to make [Moth: Deleted].

[Moth: Still editing these. She's recovering fast but it still needs work. Plus some of this gets classified or mindless.]

When I came back I could see...


[Moth: She rambles for a bit here about how long it took her to come back. Edited it out.]


We sat quietly and ate. I wanted...


[Moth: Edit. More rambling. They eventually go off for a private conversation. Things go bad.]



"Fine,... BUT you are mine first."

"Wh-What?" she stammered out. I could see I was starting to scare her. GOOD.


She couldn't find words. I slammed my hand hard to the mirror beside us.


She nodded. Just... completely lost for words. I was ruining it. I could see that... BUT SHE FUCKING STARTED IT.


[Moth: Edit. They eventually come back. Both upset. Things are quiet and tense. They still curl up together. Once they get tired.]


I just closed my eyes... TRIED to sleep. I felt the weight of the bed shift. I felt familiar arms around me.

"Idiot," she said. It wasn't mean though. She was trying to be nice.

I hugged her arms and she clung tighter.

It was nice... no one has ever really... pretended to try that hard.

For a second I thought she might actually keep her promise.

All those horrible things I wanted to do... she didn't deserve it... not yet... maybe not ever...

I dreamt many dreams that night. Dreams where I re-punished all those who have deserved it over the years. Their delicious screams... it helped cement for me that... she shouldn't be among them...



//Note to self: Cut out the [Moth: Edit] and change the ending goodbye

[Moth: She managed to rip open all of her stitches in her sleep. This one needed a lot of work. And of course it had more classifieds in it.]

Things seemed better in the morning....


[Moth: Edit. Complains about herself and the awkwardness. Then there were more talks about sensitive information before it was finally time for Nee-Chan to go.]


Theta was at the door. IMPATIENT FUCKER stood there, waiting on her.

"You're BROKEN again..." I pouted.

"I-I'm gonna miss you..." she sobbed clinging onto me.

"I..." I started and hugged her back tight as I could... miss that shoulder strength now.

"I'LL MISS YOU TOO! B-But you'll see me again. I'm gonna kill Duckie. Then I won't EVER have to run again. We can see each other ALL the time after that... I promise."

She forced a smile. I did too.

I pulled Moth over and whispered in his ear... then we both gave her a kiss on the cheek. She turned red. Overwhelmed.

She started really sobbing now. She gave Moth a hug. A kiss on the cheek.

Then she came over and gave me another big hug and... a kiss. A real one.


She was trying... really really trying where others were scared or dismissive.

She hid her face. And then she turned and left. "Bye. I'm gonna miss you, Twitch girl!" she declared, still crying as she disappeared through the door.

I thought I had lost my words... but I WAS WRONG!

"You FUCKING BETTER Nee-Chan!" I yelled after her.

And she and Theta were gone...

Part of me hopes I never see them again.

Then things can always be... perfect...


Final Moth Note

I understand a lot of people recently died as a result of the aid we were given.

They're right... that was my fault and there isn't much I can say or do about it anymore.

I'm sorry...

Moth Out.


  1. I think that's very sweet. In times like these a little friendship and compassion are needed, even if only for a short while.


    1. I WISH I could have some alone time! I have Twitch clinging to me like a lost puppy and the robot breathing down my neck. I was lucky they don't follow me into the bathroom!

      I would switch Moth for Twitch any day.

      Mostly because you'd probably kill him.


  2. Picasso, if you can read this, I hope you heal up quick. And... I'm glad Nee makes you happy.

    1. I'm happy to hear that. :p


      Quicker. This is taking FOREVER.

    2. Sniper wounds take some time Picasso. The power behind those bullets can, as Raggedy would crassly put it, really fuck you up.


    3. Mira, did...did you just curse?



      Boring laying around all day.


The more you say, the less you know...